So, it's been quite a while since I wrote in this. A lot has changed since last time I wrote. The biggest thing is that: I no longer have an appendix!! Haha, that was a whole different experience. It happened in April, right after Easter. I had gotten off work a little early on a Friday and my roommate was home from work that day. So she and I decided to have a little girl time. I felt fine that day, so I was in good spirits. We came home a few hours afterr work and I decided to take a nap. I slept a little later than normal, which should have tipped me off that something was wrong. When I woke up, I had a horrible stomach ache. I thought it was just indegestion, so my roommate and I tried everything. Nothing worked and I was in tears at that point. Finally, I talked to my Mom and figured that it was best that I visit the ER. I was really nervous about going because I didn't have a lot of money, and I had anxiety about what was going to happen. Thankfully, I live across the street from the hospital so we didn't have to call an ambulance. I didn't have to wait long at all, which was very fortunate. The pain continued to get worse and my patience was running thin. After many blood and urine tests, nothing showed up. Finally, I was taken in for a CT scan which showed acute appendicitis. I knew at that point that I was looking at surgery, and it wouldn't be easy. I was told I had an hour and a half before I was to be in surgery, and I was terrified. I haven't had surgery since I was 5 so I didn't know what to expect. I was very afraid of not waking up from the surgery, and started to really freak out. I called my Mom and she said she'd be in Logan first thing in the morning. I remember asking her, the nurses, and my roommate if I was going to die. That was honestly the scariest moment in my life. After being comforted as much as possible, I was wheeled into surgery. The first thing I remember after waking up is asking where my Mom was. I was so scared and I needed the comfort only a Mom can give. I was in recovery about an hour, than went back to my room, where I slept. About 9:00 a.m., my Mom showed up. The was probably the scaredest I've ever seen her. I had a fairly difficult recovery, and I'm still trying to recover to be back to normal. My mom stayed in Logan for a few days with me and took care of me. It was such a wonderful time for me to have her there, and know that I was being taken care of.
The second biggest thing: I had another surgery on Tuesday! This was for kidney stones. I woke up at 2:15 in the morning with the worst pain ever, including the appendix. I immediately told my roommate that something was wrong and I needed to go to the ER. The pain was horrible and was continuing to worsen. As I got all checked in and got blood tests going, I was in agony. I had a feeling I had kidney stones, but I wasn't completely certain. I had to keep asking for pain medication, nothing would help. For a few hours, I felt like I was going to die if I so much as moved my fingers. Finally, we found medication that helped. I went in for a CT scan and found out that the stone was 5 mm. Holy cow, that caused so much pain. The urologist came to my room and told me that I had a few options. I could go home and let it pass, I could stay in the hospital and let it pass, or I could have surgery to laser it. My mom wasn't at the hospital quite yet, but I knew I was going to get the surgery. There was no way I was going to be in that much pain for a few days. My Mom got there a few minutes after and we both decided that the surgery was the best option. I was so relieved but scared at the same time. I wasn't as scared for this surgery as the appendectomy. A lot of it was that my Mom was already there. A lot of it was also that this was a much easier and faster surgery. I still had fears but nothing compared to before. I came out okay and was released later that day.
Having those two surgeries helped me see so much. For the appendectomy, so many friends came to see me. It was overwhelming at times to feel how much I was cared for and how many friends I had. I also realized what an amazing best friend I have. She was in the hospital with me both times, and basically stayed by my side the whole time. She called into work both times and she didn't have to do that. I am so grateful for that and I hope she knows that. The biggest realization I had was that I have the best Mom in the world. She gave up time for me, and did a lot of traveling which wasn't easy for her. I am so glad that she pretty much dropped everything for me, and she didn't complain once. I don't know where I would be without her.
Well, enough of the down side of the past few months. In June, my roommate and I got to attend a concert that I have been looking forward to for so long: the Backstreet Boys!!!! I know a lot of people are probably laughing at that, but it was so much fun. I picked up the tickets that day, and I seriously scored on seats. Front row from the floor. She and I were so excited to be going. She and I have always loved the Backstreet Boys and we really enjoyed ourselves. This was the first concert I've ever been to without my parents. My Mom took me to my first concert 13 years ago (also the Backstreet Boys). My dad took me to many concerts from them and NSYNC. But, BSB has always been my favorite. It was a bitter sweet experience to be at the concert, mostly because my dad wasn't there. I'm sure he was very pleased that he didn't have to take me, but it felt weird to be there without him. But it was a great night for both of us, and it was so worth it!
I've also come to realize in the past few months that I need to learn to be happy and take care of myself first. I've always been concerned about what other people think of me, so I hide who I really am. But the older I've gotten, the more I've realized that I am only going to be who I am, and I can't apologize for that. I'm coming to terms with some decisions I've made in my life, and living my life for me.
There's a lot more to talk about, but I'm sick of writing. So I will update more of my life soon, I hope.
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